when my present circumstance doesn't match my dreams

Ever felt stuck? Ever dreamed of being something that was vastly different than your 9-5 job? Ever had dreams of being a rockstar but what paid the bills was flipping burgers at a fast food joint?

I have.


My mom has reminded me on multiple occasions that when you begin to feel discouraged, look back on times when God has come through; so in my moments of feeling like my dreams are vastly different than my every day I have been reading through the stories of David and Joseph.




we know David as the great king, as the man who defeated Goliath, as the Psalmist, as the man after God's own heart; but David began in the most humble of beginnings, as a shepherd.


Sheep are seen as "stupid" animals who are mindless and need a shepherd in order to survive, this was David's humble job day in and day out. One thing I find precious is that even when doing a job that felt mundane, David honed his giftings and skills (whether he realized it or not, he was being prepared for the rest of his destiny). David wrote songs out in the field and he probably had no idea that the worshiper in him was being developed into a worship leader (in all aspects of his life). The strength he needed to defeat Goliath was developed when he protected the sheep from wild beasts with his bare hands. 

what is God developing in you now?

In the book, Sun Stand Still, Steven Furtick talks about there being a need in the world that we have the giftings and abilities to meet; we just have to train our eyes to see them. 

"God's invitation for you to step out in audacious faith isn't going to fall from the sky

 and hit you in the head. You've got to train your eyes to look for it. 

The impossible becomes possible for you only as you carefully 

observe and faithfully obey the direction of the Holy Spirit" 

David met physical needs, by bringing food to his brothers on the frontlines of battle. He didn't get discouraged his oldest brother questioned his presence on the battlelines, "why have you come down here? And with whom did you leave those sheep in the desert" (1 samuel 17:28)

And when the need around David became clear, he realized that the Lord had already prepared him for this moment within the "mundane" activity of watching sheep, 

"Your servant has been keeping his father's sheep. When a lion or a bear came and carried off a sheep from the flock, I went after it, struck it and rescued the sheep from its mouth. When it turned on me, I seized by its hair, struck it and killed it. Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God. The Lord who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine"

(1 samuel 17:34-37)

don't lose heart, this time you are in is not useless or without purpose.

look around you, what needs can you meet at this very moment with the abilities you have?

don't fret, the Lord is preparing you with skills now for a purpose later.

and don't worry, I'm reminding my own self of this.

when God closes a door, He doesn't open a window

God isn't cheap.  and yet, we insinuate that He is by saying phrases like "when God closes a door, He opens a window".  In thinking about that phrase today, I came to the conclusion that i think it's a stupid phrase.  STUPID.  let me illustrate: this phrase is the equivalent to asking God for an ipod and he says "nah, you can have the cheap version, the iPoo".


does that make sense? (hint: NO!) why would God close a door and give me something smaller instead? (think a big door versus a little window)


I just got a GREAT job offer in College Station, TX (Texas A & M!); a two bedroom, luxury apartment free, $12/hr, 40+ hours a week , commission and incentives. How AWESOME does that sound? I was so excited about this job; I was ready and willing to pick up and move 20 driving-hours-away within the next two weeks. This seemed like such a perfect fix for my personality and such an exciting new adventure. In the wake of this decision I prayed for wisdom, direction and clear direction. I woke up this morning with an OVERWHELMING sense that I wasn't supposed to take this job. This hit me like a ton of bricks...I was so excited to take this opportunity. But my parents reminded me of something; that if we have to work and work to make something WORK, then we are doing God's job. I realized that while the obstacles to this Texas job weren't many, they were signifcant enough that I needed God to move to give me peace.


I cried today when I thought about sending an email thanking the company for the offer but declining it. I wanted this so badly, but I had to remind myself over and over again that God will never give us less than we've had. (really, He won't!) And that in life there are always good situations that come before the BEST situation. So while this doesn't make sense to me; it  gives me hope to think of how much I hate the phrase about God, doors and windows, and how stupid & untrue that phrase is. 


Instead, when God closes a window, we become aware of the door He has opened.

"your beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will your future be" (job 8:7)      

Camping with God

YOUR tent.
MY tent.
Our tent is secure and when we take stock of our property we will find nothing missing. Nothing will be lost and nothing will be lacking. regardless of whatever you are dealing with, you are covered by Gods provision, protection and favor. Your desires dreams etc are secure in Him regardless of how things look. Today the Lord quietly asked my heart, 'have I ever not been faithful?'. The answer to that....NOPE. So why would He start now?

Job 5:20-25 (the Mary Catherine version)

"You are the Author of creation,
and STILL You know my heart"
("waiting here for you" christy nockles)

wondering if God gave you the short straw.

Sometimes it's easy to look at circumstances in our life (crummy job situations, crummy relationship situations, crummy debt, crummy health, etc etc etc) and wonder “did God just ask everyone to draw straws and I got the short one?!”

in case you didn't know, God doesn't carry around a batch of straws in His pocket; ready to spring them on us and make us draw one at a moment's notice.

God isn't out to “get us”. He isn't out to make us feel forgotten. He isn't out to cause us pain. He doesn't cause chaos and watch us squirm.

If anyone felt like he got the short-end-of-the-deal, it would be David who could win that award. He was the youngest son, he was the smallest son and he was chosen to deliver snacks to his big brothers while THEY fought the raging war. David probably felt like he was constantly having to prove himself. He probably wondered when he'd catch a break. When it'd be his turn.

If David would have gotten frustrated every time he felt he was proving himself 

or every time things were hard or every time he faced something frustrating;

 he would have never made it to a defining moment in his life.

In Samuel 16, God puts it on Samuel's heart to go and anoint a man. A future king. He goes to look among a local man's strong, able sons.

“ Then Samuel performed the purification rite for Jesse and his sons and invited them to the sacrifice, too. When they arrived, Samuel took one look at Eliab and thought, “Surely this is the Lord’s anointed!”But the Lord said to Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:5-7)

Samuel went searching through 7 sons, and none were the ones the Lord had sent him for; but rather the youngest was chosen.

 The one who was working as a shepherd of sheep.

 A song writer to a crowd of wandering animals.

“So Jesse sent for him. He was dark and handsome, with beautiful eyes. And the Lord said, “This is the one; anoint him.” So as David stood there among his brothers, Samuel took the flask of olive oil he had brought and anointed David with the oil. And the Spirit of the Lord came powerfully upon David from that day on.” (verses 12-13)

the Lord looks at the heart. Keep your heart right when you face frustrating, disheartening, weary situations; it's your heart that the Lord is looking at when He comes to anoint you and set you on a wild adventure.

Jesus is a gentleman.

Often (if not most of the time) I blog about when Jesus challenges me or brings me to examine something in my life or heart. (like David's prayer "examine my heart O Lord") 

Today though I'd like to share something short and simple: Jesus is a gentleman.

In John 4, Jesus crosses paths  with a Samaritan woman 

at a well and they begin discussing what 

is generally discussed at a well: WATER.

During the course of the conversation 

of living water(thirst quenching)

 vs. tap water(temporary fullfillment),

Jesus tells the woman "Go, call your husband and come back"  (verse 16)

Jesus knew that she didn't have a husband, that in fact she was a woman who had had several husbands and was currently sleeping with a man whom she wasn't married to. Jesus knew this and yet He was still being a gentleman. He could have called her out right then & there, but true to his character and His nature, He waited for her to tell Him that she didn't have a husband.

It can be easy to forget how compassionate,

kind, thoughtful and gentle God is

during the course of the daily walk; it's much

easier to see how He challenges, stretches and prunes us.

so here's a reminder for today: Jesus is a gentleman.

how are YOU going to show that side of Jesus to people around you today?

God doesn't gossip.

"were your ears buzzing yesterday? because we were talking about you!"


God causes our ears to buzz or "tingle" but that's not because He's a gossip. He's revealing something to you. to me.


Ever woken up and felt like reality smacked you in the face, gave you a wedgie and then splashed ice-cold water in your face?  That was me on Monday. I woke up and it suddenly became oh-so-real that my lease is up on July 31st, the Grad program I want to go into is shut down until further notice and I don't have a long term career or prospect at this moment.  My Dad was encouraging me to think about what I wanted to do with my life, to think about what I was created to do. what was Mary Catherine created specifically to fill that only she can? "some need in the world that you are uniquely positioned to me" (steven furtick, sun stand still)


I immediately felt like I didn't know. I felt like my dreams as a little girl pretending to give a 'Best New Artist' interview to Entertainment Tonight or my college dreams of being a Motivational Speaker with a Masters in I/O Psychology were null-and-void.

"your vision will probably flow from something

 you're already doing--relationships you've already established,

 priorities you're already passionate about" (steven furtick)

I've mentioned before that when I get anxious or stressed I run around like a chicken with my head cut off and am unable to hear from the Lord in the midst of my melodramatic wailing sessions, so He decided to wake me up at 4:35 Tuesday morning and beckon me to spend time with Him.  I picked up where I left off in my current ready, Sun Stand Still (By Steven Furtick) and then felt led to read the story of when Samuel heard from the Lord in the middle of the night.

Like Samuel, the Lord has often tried to speak to me and I get confused or think I'm hearing things (" ' my son' Eli said, ' I did not call you, go back and lie down' " 1 Samuel 3:6)  But when Samuel finally responds to the Lord ( " 'speak Lord for your servant is listening' so Samuel went and lay down in his place" verse 9) the Lord gave Samuel (and myself) a very distinct way to identify when the Lord is speaking to us, especially when He is trying to tell us of things to come.... tingle.

"See I am about to do something in Israel that will make the ears

of everyone who hears of it tingle"

1Samuel 3:11

What is it that the Lord is causing

my ears to tingle about?

What need around me gets me excited

and causes me to bravely think

I was designed to meet it?

In the course of my day, what am I passionate about?

"if the dream in your heart isn't biblically based,

focused on Jesus,

affirmed by the key people in your life,

tethered to your passions, gifts and life experiences,

chances are,

you're way off prompt"

(steven furtick)

 I don't have an answer for you right now, but I am what I am doing is actively listening for the tingle....

Finding God in the Beginning

I realized today that I need to start from the beginning and search for God from the very beginning of creation. Graduating college has left me in what feels like a tail spin and I think I just need to start from the beginning and become His friend all over again. I'll be sharing this journey here in the future.

"seek and you will find Me"